Business etiquette
Howard Byrom
It all started with the phrase 'when in Rome...'
2008-10-12
When in…
…Nigeria
Many nations around the world have a loose association with backhanders, but in Nigeria bribes are an institution. Dash as these kickbacks are known has long been the grease that lubricates this oil-rich West African country. There are over 250 different peoples, languages, histories, and religions all rubbing shoulder to shoulder in this hectic, colourful and often volatile republic. Dash is the one thing that unites them.
The custom of the prior cash incentive is best described by Peter Enahoro in his satirical book, How to e a Nigerian: dash is a “sweetly quaint custom of expressing gratitude in anticipation of services about to be rendered”.
Needless to say Nigerians are insulted by the description of dash as bribery. Everyone willingly accepts – nay, expects - it from waiters to bank clerks. It’s customary to pay someone just for the simple pleasure of being allowed in or out of the airport. Which leads neatly into another scam that first time travellers need to be aware of when visiting Nigeria…
One rouse is numerous touts acting as immigration agents who claim to rush travellers through the system quicker. Ignore them, they merely wish to separate you from your passport so that you will, in turn, pay them a handsome bribe in order to get it back. There’s a simple way around this, of course - never hand over documents to anyone but uniformed personnel from Nigerian customs or immigration departments.
Of course, it’s not all about corruption, there’s a whole host of other time honoured traditions in rural Nigeria that can help bring about a downfall for the unwitting visitor.
Never hand things over to people, especially adults and elders older than you, with your left hand. It's considered an insult. Beware on trains and other forms of public transport -crossing or jumping over someone's legs if they are sitting with the legs extended out is considered bad luck.
Thankfully, prostrating yourself before elders has abated in recent times, but it still pays to show some form of respect.
…Azerbaijan
Never take no for an answer in this oil-rich nation on the shores of the Caspian Sea. Not if your offering a local a drink or any other form of hospitality. In these kinds of situations, you always have to ask an Azerbaijani three times before they'll accept. Azerbaijanis don't consider it polite to accept an offer for the first time – or even the second. The reasoning behind this is a proud tradition of maintaining the impression of not being in need.
A second offer gives them a chance to judge how sincere their host is. By the time you make them a third offer they'll finally give you a frank answer.
Of course, it can work to your advantage in commercial, situations and dealing with government officials. Many a negative magically transforms into an affirmative with a little patience, persistence, and diplomacy.
Gift-giving is also a refined art in Azerbaijan and there are many traditions associated with it. For example, never roll up to an Azerbaijani dinner invitation empty-handed.
It’s customary to bring a token of your appreciation for the host in the form of a gift. As at home, flowers are always a good standby – red, pink or white roses will be happily accepted. But take note: never ever present them in an even bunch. Always chose an odd number. Even numbers are traditionally associated with funerals, death, and mourning.
Alternatively, if you do take a present, don’t feel insulted yourself if the host doesn’t unwrap it in your presence. Even though a gift is expected, the host will insist you shouldn’t have brought one and will salt it away to be opened in private. Which, of course, is a boon for anyone in the habit of giving tactless, pointless, and plain inappropriate gifts.
…England
Americans and Britons share a language, but don't make the mistake of viewing the cultures as interchangeable. They aren’t. For starters the UK is made up of four distinct countries – England, Scotland, Ireland, and Wales; each with fiercely independent identities. The likelihood is you’ll be conducting most of your business in London - which, in itself is almost an entirely separate city-state estranged from the rest of England. Still, certain rules apply for all of them.
First and foremost: drinking. In all probability you will be invited for a drink after business hours with your work colleagues. This will entail leaving the work place and entering a pub with no diversions except to obtain funds from a cash point. Do not expect to eat food in the pub. In all likelihood there will be nothing there for you except peanuts and crisps (that’s chips for our American readers).
In fact, eating may well be frowned upon until after the pub closes (traditionally 11pm, but now later). Instead concentrate your attention on the finer details of the customs of after work drinks. Orders are paid for in turn, generally for the entire party. These are known as rounds. As a visitor, you won’t be expected to buy first; but do offer – it will be noted. When it finally is your round, take the drink orders and relay them to the bartender, and ask for them on a tray. The whole pub will explode should you drop any!
Don’t be shy - if you don’t drink, tell your colleagues. Making a fool of yourself is only acceptable amongst close friends and rarely advisable with work colleagues. Remember - the British make a great show of appearing not to be drunk – even when they have one arm around the lamp post and declaring their undying love for the rest of humanity!
